Learning to let go

learning to let go.. does NOT mean giving up. let me make that clear from the get go.
i have been holding on to baby clothes, and baby items from the time owen was born, some from even when wyatt was born. maybe it sounds crazy to some people but to me it was just what made sense, i mean we fully plan to have another baby (if were so lucky to ever see that bfp) and that hasnt changed in any way. we still intend to keep trying and hoping for the bfp. however, i just cant see the point into holding onto everything any more, i have to start letting go. which is what i have started doing. i have started listing all of the baby close on a fb page for sale (bubbas closet) i had all intentions of doing it on blogger as well but yeah thats not working out so well just yet *haha* i have just a small bit left to list and have decided on only keeping 3 outfits that i just cant seem to part with just yet.
the big thing is the bigger stuff, the high chair, the pack and play, the swing, etc and although i wont be listing those online (shipping wise its just not worth it) i am thinking of maybe yardsale'n them and what dont sell donating to a local resale shop thats proceeds go to helping folks in need (which btw i have done with some of the clothing as well).
were not planning on stopping our ttc stuff anytime soon but maybe i just need to let go of a few things. things are just that *things* things that can be replaced and upgraded. i do however plan to hold onto my crib until we are completely done with ttc, but its safely stored so im not worried or concerned much about anything happening with it.
so thats what im doing now.. letting go but not giving up. maybe if i let go, a bfp will happen sooner rather than later.

a much needed trip

now while i would love to say that our well needed trip was to some fancy exotic location .. hell i cant even say we went to some local tourist trap attraction.. our much need trip was to none other than the hundred dollar store (better known as walmart)
ah but what an exciting trip it was.. i cant even recall the last time we had the joys of walking through the walmart doors.. but i can tell you its been long enough to leave me showing using the man soap ron cant stand and the baby conditioner i pick up for mr bed head since his hair is so long and i want to keep it from tangling up on him. ah yes bad it was indeed.. things were running increasingly thin and most know that its something i try to avoid happening but i suppose from time to time its bound to happen. thankfully everything is now restocked.. until next time at least!
on our way to walmart we stopped off at a few garage sales.. didnt find a whole lot. but thats kinda my fault for not moving my ass this morning when ron called me the 12 times he did.. well i did move it just it wasnt to get on my feet but rather to roll over and go back to sleep *haha* .. yeah sorry baby!
after we left walmart we decided to swing by the flea market.. we know better i mean its crazy how a flea market used to be *a place to get good deals from people wanting to get rid of what they saw as trash* to now what it has become *an open aired antique mall* or *just like walmart prices* i mean seriously if i wanted to pay big money id either hit the antique stores or walmart store itself.. whatever happened to deals?
i do have to admit it was kinda strange though, the more we walked through the flea market the more i happened to notice that the folks walking by me looked more and more like people you would see in a carnival side show.. does that sound odd? i mean im not trying to be *mean* its just an observation.. although i must admit it is your one stop shop for whatever you need.. shampoo get it from the vender on the right.. need some video games.. go to the vender on the left.. need some avon.. they got it! .. want your belly button pierced? youve come to the right place *lol*

that was pretty much the extent of our excitement today.. now im sitting here trying to keep my eyes open .. however a nap sure does sound good about right now!

lifes simple pleasures

why did i title my blog this? i mean of the millions of names out there that i could come up with .. why this one?
because to me thats what life is about .. the simple pleasures!
i dont need a million dollars or a mansion tucked somewhere high in the hills.. i need the simple things that bring a smile to my heart and my face..
it gets me sometimes when i see folks talk about what they dont have.. i mean i get the whole aspect from it and i understand why they do.. they are venting and letting it all out which is totally understandable. but in truth, you only get out of something what you put into it.
if you jump in and do your very best.. work hard.. love like no other and life like today is your last, and you look for the small things that bring that smile to you, you will be happy and life will be grand.
i try not to put to much into the bad and more into the good.. the funny jokes the kids will tell that arent really all that funny but you laugh because their laughter is so contagious. the fact that my husband has held some jobs that many would feel were to good for them and yet he did it.. not for anything other than the fact that he did it for us!
yes i get annoyed who doesnt? but hell we have been through it all.. we have gone without and always put the kids first.. their needs and even some wants.. i was looking over photos the other day .. old pictures from our kids growing up and how happy i am to have the memories that we do.. and looking forward to making many many more!
i dont care what it is that your facing in life today, take a moment and think about the simple things in life that put that smile on your face.. theres always something positive to see! you just sometimes have to look a bit harder as reality likes to toss what there isnt in your face a bit more than what is.
if you work hard and do your very best than you will reap the rewards for that.. i dont care if its some job at a gas station or flipping burgers at mcdonalds .. or in my husbands case.. being the guy to picked the pine cones and sticks out of pine straw so that it can be bailed for sale.
weve been on top of the world with buying our own home, having the brand new car in our driveway.. to having everything we own minus a few things stuck in a storage shed and no vehicle to drive and depending on others.
the fact is.. we are ultimately the only ones in control of where our future goes and its our job to learn from our own past mistakes.. its our job to make our dreams come true and no one else can do it for us.
we have learned, we continue to learn, and i hope we will always learn from bad decisions we made.
our life isnt always perfect but hell as many times as we get knocked down we will brush ourselves off, get back up, hold our heads high and try again!

sunday sunday sunday

what a way to wake up.. bigger boys at it again. why must they fight over the oddest of things? todays choice was a video game.. something about wyatt wanting to play on little rons game and little ron saying no! ah you would have thought the world was coming to an end the way it was going down when i woke up *grr*
as for now.. little ron is back outside working on his boat.. i think ron is secretly cringing to the fact that yesterday the wildabeast and little ron started painting his john boat using the $102 primer and now they are putting the black bottom paint on it which is costing $200 or so.. yeah.. its a HUGE cringe in that aspect.. this paint that was supposed to go on the bottom of his atlantic is now being plastered all over the bottom and sides of his aluminum john boat.. but ah what can you say to the wildabeast? not a damn thing without him running off in a tissy fit!
yes i think the tensions are running high around here these last few days.. im left dreaming of our own place and getting the heck out of here .. *soon* cant happen fast enough for me thats for sure, but the facts are that its not something were willing to blindly jump into without a concrete plan. sure the want for that decision on the whim is always there but its not something im willing to jump into blindly.
tomorrow i need to send in a note to wyatts teacher and sometime tonight go over with him again the things that happened on fridays bus ride home *argh* the things that lead up to my boy coming into the house, putting his backpack on and than loosing it and just bawling on the couch until i could get out of him what was wrong.. breaks my heart to see him so sad and so hurt.. wyatt wears his heart on his sleeve always has always will. but to see his heart so hurt makes mine hurt so much.
so the friday incident was this..
they were on the bus headed home from school when another boy wouldnt leave his hands off the back of the seat behind wyatts head.. wyatt kept telling him to move his hands.. the kid wouldnt listen to him.. wyatt started to move his hands off the seat and the kid only put them back.. well at one point in time wyatt moved his hands and i guess accidentally hit him. according to wyatt it wasnt hard or intentional.. but of course some little girl told on wyatt for hitting the boy and than came back and told wyatt he was going to have to go see the principle on monday. which put wyatt into tears ~
i told him to just be honest with the principle on everything that happened and we will go from there.. guess i will see what a phone call or a note home brings on monday after school.. we all know how much the principle loves me from last years IEP meeting with wyatt .. so lets see if she loves me more when we discuss the incident on the bus *fun fun fun*

Never forget 9/11/01

is it friday yet?

im seriously beginning to hate the alarm clock .. although i must say that most mornings i dont hear it go off.. maybe i sleep through it, maybe its ron cutting it off before i wake up .. i havent a clue although i have been accused of kicking ron when his alarm went off at 5:30am *sorry baby*

anyways today has been filled with fun interesting things.. first of all i have been up since o'dark hundred and not been able to jump in the shower because im waiting on the bug guy to get here.. asked what time he would be here and i get told *i guess about the normal time* well gee next time can i have an hour? because it makes doing up my daily schedule so much easier..
needless to say.. this left me sitting here until nearly 2:30pm waiting for him to show up *argh* no shower now.. gotta wait on buses, get homework done.. maybe i can get in there sometime before the hubba gets home from work?

my phones dead.. so i couldnt call mom to find out how she is doing.. and so i ask someone to run down there for me.. mother shows up and she has a tooth infection.. crap just what she needs. no job, living off unemployment which is a joke, no insurance and walla here have this! another thing to add to my list of *if there is a god things i need to seriously talk to him about*

while waiting to talk to her.. owen was alone in the kitchen and i heard the fridge open .. nothing new hes a daily shopper for things to get.. he likes to go in and grab cheese etc.. well what happens? i hear this strange noise and the brand new carton of 18 eggs.. all over the floor! *argh* gotta love him! so i start to clean it up and hes trying to help but i had him stand over to the side so i could get it done... when the old religious one walks in and says *hey maybe we can stick it in a bowl and salvage them* EEEWWWW um NO .. i mean HELL NO they were all over the floor.. we have a dog and cats .. yuck.. yeah GROSS.. needless to say i made sure all were disposed of safely in the trash can! FYI never eat eggs out of a bowl in this house.. you never know where they have been at *wink wink* haha

the other thing on my mind is aunt R sent me an email yesterday.. short (maybe in fear of me having to tell her off again?) but she just basically said that grandpa D's 3rd wife passed away (i had only met the woman once) .. still not sure why the need to let me know.. maybe she was just trying to be nice.. just keep it to that.
but she added to it that uncle R is currently engaged but she dont know the extent of it or something because hes only been with E for like 2 months.. um okay are we serious here? i mean family gossip.. i mean i know when the youngest uncle R had gotten married to the black girl that was like HUGE gossip for the family *rolls eyes* but now this uncle R (yeah i know confusing but hey thats what happens when your grandparents have 6 kids whose names all start with the letter R) .. anways the oldest uncle R is like top family gossip i suppose..
in all honestly the oldest uncle R is like 56/57 years old and im sure he is more than capable of getting married if he chooses.. geesh people!

mailbox christmas

i love when my mailbox feels more like christmas than a bill warehouse.. but than again who wouldnt love that? i mean even if you have ordered something seeing that bigger envelope bulging out or that package just makes you all giddy inside dont it?
unfortunately i do not have it in me to spend money.. i can window shop all day long but beyond that.. i seriously have no interest unless its something i need.. i have no interest or desire to go into the mall.. i am seriously perfectly fine just going to the jc penney and out again without ever stepping through *the big hole* as my kids have always called it *lol*
so how does my mailbox feel more like christmas than a bill warehouse? simple i do have an addiction.. an addiction to freebies.. and im not talking those stupid half a head samples of shampoo and conditioner that you stand there looking at thinking *um okay* .. im talking the good stuff..
my addiction however sometimes has me wondering *why do i have 6 margarita balls in the dining room* oh yeah.. that slight addiction to free things and the fact that Jose Curevo keeps tempting me week by week.. now in truth i want a pitcher but i cant seem to find them on there anymore.. so the margarita ball i have.. 6 deep .. it was suggested by a friend that if i got enough i could maybe make owen a margarita ball fort! now thats an idea!
but i must say i havent had so many printed pictures of my boys in years.. i wont tell you how long its been since i sent in a roll of film and im sure there may still be some floating around undeveloped somewhere.. or had any of the thousands on disks printed off.. im still going through the disks to figure out what is what.. but you know.. now .. now i do them 50 or so at a time and the best part is.. all of them are completely FREE.. yep FREE i dont pay for one of them! 8x10's, 5x7's, 4x6's .. you name it i got it.. matter of fact im waiting on another shipment of 100 free prints this week!
but what started this whole post was todays mailbox finds.. a bounce dryer bar and a $15.00 gift card from napster.. ah how i wish it would have been the mp3 player but can one really complain about free? i dont think so..
i did however miss out on my bic pen only to fail at yet another free dish soap from gain.. ah well at least i got the dawn dish soap and cascade for the dishwasher.. i hope they are decent sized!
the pens will be there again for the next few days.. at least i can manage to get a few more in to go with my collection before the end is here!

BLOG NEGLECT

*sorry*
the funny thing is i find myself online just about every day.. normally hunting down that freebie of the day.. updating my chart or whatever but somehow .. someway every day im online and yet i dont come here and update my blog.. bad blog owner i know and for that *sorry*

okay the latest and the greatest..

hurricane earl came steaming by.. omg it was the worst hurricane headed for the coast in years.. i mean seriously spinning like a crazy man at a cat.4 .. and than it got closer and closer and the winds got lower and lower.. and it turned and we barely got a thing here on our little part of the coast *blah* all that work up.. the hype.. closing of schools for 2 extra days.. evacuation of the island for winds not even decent enough to attempt our great mission of kiting across the back yard (hey when your in a hurricane and have no cable tv or power you have to find something to entertain yourself) ah well.. looks like the *outter banks* got slammed a bit worse.. but their barrier islands stick out further than ours does.. so until the next big mean windy rotating storm head our way.. its back to life as normal for us ..

the kids however are thrilled with their 5 day weekend.. and yes just when i got into the swing of waking up at 6am and temping at the same time daily.. just when things were *right* i get 5 days where i cant remember if today is sunday or is it monday.. and i surely cant temp when i do manage to figure out the sun is shining.. so consider this cycle a *blah* one on the temping side.. what good does it really do.. i know baby dancing must continue until at least cd20 so continue we shall!

on a more positive and happy note.. i would like to tell a very special friend CONGRATS on her bfp today.. OMG its soo exciting and im hoping and wishing and all that jazz that she has a super sticky bean! *grow baby grow* .. girlie you know who you are and you give me so much hope!

well i suppose thats about it for updates for now.. just waiting out the last of the clothes to dry so i can fold them up and get ready to join the rest of the men in the house who are snoring away ~

until next time...